Tuesday, December 16, 2008

and he can't understand, how everyone goes on breathing when true love ends.

"and his mother whispered quietly, heavens not a place that you go when you die, it's that moment in life when you actually feel alive. so live for the moment, and take this advice live by every word. love is just a hoax so forget anything that you have heard."



So I'm slowly rebuilding, and feeling terrific. I'm young, but getting older, which makes more of a reason for me to just stop pressuring happiness and just live. I love my friends, and I think I'm slowly turning into the old me, never worried, always spontaneous and up for adventurous fun. Actually, I definitely had my worries, just for none of the things I'm talking about now. I'm going to live a hopeful and positive life, and maybe one day an inspiring one. I'm feeling pretty content, I do not need a guy to make me have any sort of joy in myself. I realized that I have to find it in me first before anyone else can. The more I start to get to know and understand myself the more I appreciate myself. The more I start to grow up and be something more. The past few weeks, I stopped believing in most things and that's not good. You should believe in everything and never let something little and not worth it change your mind. I know now, to refresh my life and start from scratch, be something new, something wanted. I'm wanted by my best friends, and slowly even myself. It's something I can smile about, look forward to. It's just high school, it's silly to take anything seriously anyways. Shit happens, this is when you learn what you can tolerate or can't. You learn what shitty guys mean, and you learn what the ones who matter a lot means. It's just a time for a lot of lessons and each person is different. Some people need more lessons, some just need a couple. It doesn't mean anyones better than anyone else, it's just all about how it happens that way. I know I have so much in store for me and I can't wait to find out what it is. So I'm going to keep my chin up and be fucking amazing.

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