Monday, May 31, 2010

I'm gonna leave you the first chance I get

Hi. I like this little Macbook a lot.
We are going to get along just wonderfully.

When it comes to guys, I get myself in a lose-lose situation.
There is the flirty stage, and that's fun for the couple days that it lasts. Then, I realize that they are actually really starting to like me, and I get turned off and just stop talking to them all in all.
But I would have kept liking them if they didn't act so attached, and made it seem like I had to chase them.
I don't like the ones who stay tied on my fingers, but the ones who keep slipping off.
It sounds really fucked up, and it is, because I really just want to be swepppppt off my feet.
bah.
I need to get out of that mindset where romance is a game, so I can really be happy with someone I can stand still with.
Maybe it's time I let that one nice boy win.
thankfully- I'm finally opening up.
so let the sweeping begin.

I've got to get ready, Tony and Cameron are coming over. I'm going to take them around the island, I think they want to go to Harbor Town so maybe I'll take them there.
Have a good day, I heart (some of) you!

xoxo

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Blogging is just fun to do

When it's late at night and you are in a big house you only sleep in once a year. All the lights are out, and the only thing you can smell is faded cigarette smoke & the only thing you can hear is the tall basement stairs creaking.

It's basically pretty relaxing. I'm taking a break from reading as well, a book called A Million Little Pieces.
It's cliche, yes, and I read it a long time ago but I don't really remember a thing.
I don't want to read anything else about crazy people or, in this case, mental institutions (loony bins as I like to call them) after watching Shutter Island for the first time.
Movie review! In case you havent seen this movie I will tell you now I may give out some spoiler alerts, so...beware?
I love movies like this, I have refrained from Shutter Island since it came out because typical me hates watching things that everyone talks about constantly and urges me to see it. So I was always just like, oh sounds good, yeah, I'll see it one of these days. Never did. Until vacation when my uncle who is obsessed with technology and has all these weird ass inventions and new gadgets lying around the house, offers to play it after burning it from the internet. So, I totally agreed to watch it. It would be with my family who has never heard of it before and I could be the one who says, oh yeah guys I know about this movie. And they wouldn't have a clue. So, we watched it tonight.
It completely played with my mind, it's creepy how fast someone could convince you that you are completely insane within five minutes if they had the right tricks up their sleeves. Sometimes I think that half the patients in the institutions these days are there for misconceptions of their mind. Anyone has what it takes to be as crazy as the next guy, he's just had different strings pulled. We could be in his shoes any day. Maybe. With a little lobotomy done, who knows!
Anyways, since all my friends kept glorifying the incredible twist in the ending of this movie, I had a feeling that the end was going to be just as it turned out to be so I wasn't quite as amazed as I hoped for. I had a feeling he was imagining certain people, and that he probably was the murderer of his wife and lived with a guilty conscience which is pretty common.

I can't sit here and act like a know it all.
I mean, it is like 'they' say, right? If you get surgery often, does that really make you a surgeon?




Fuck yes it makes you a surgeon, you bet your ass it makes you a surgeon, and don't you forget it.

This trip has been all that it was cracked up to be. Family, drunken gatherings (on my part), malls, attractions, hills, and reminiscing.
As usual, all that 'fun' has to come to an end, and that end is tomorrow. We are leaving to come back home to the flat land.
I wish I lived in a hilly area, with a fun quaint city where there were always things to do and shows to see. That's all I ask. I plan on doing so very soon.
I wasn't made to come to South Carolina, I wasn't ever made to live there.
Maybe it's not exactly here that I'd live, but it will have pretty green grassed hills and shit to do.

I put my niece to bed last night, and it was weird as hell because my mom packed her the little books I was read before bed when I was 6 or 7. I felt like a mom. I ran her bath, put on her pj's, brushed her teeth and tucked her under the covers. I sat facing her while reading a curious george story book as I noticed she didn't look satisfied. I asked what was wrong and she wanted me to get under the covers with her and lay beside her while I read. I decided, why not, and did as she asked. I felt her head drop on my chest and I ran my fingers through her hair which is almost an impulse for me to do, and I remember being in her place only years ago. I got so creeped out by time and how much things change and how it all slips through the cracks of my fingers.

I'm pissed at my dad too because I told him that I had someone taking care of my cat while I was gone and he said that was fine, and then I get a call from matt saying pants wasnt in my room. So then I call my dad and he says he threw her outside just because he had a stuffy nose and figured he was allergic to cats. asshole. I started having a meltdown and crying my eyes out, I called matt and just cried to him asking to look for her. I still can't believe I did that, how awkward. So he was like, mel i'm already on it and he was in my backyard in like 5 minutes and said her food was outside and that he saw an animal under my house but couldnt see what it was. All i remember is screaming at my dad on the phone about how much i hate him until i was on my aunts lawn curled up in a ball yelling in the phone for all the neighbors to see what a wacked out job I was. Goodness. Even now I still don't know where my cat is but Matt said he's been looking everyday and putting food in her bowl. I don't know if that should make me feel better or not. My sister kept comforting me because she could kind of relate to how I felt, she knew how much of an asshole my dad was, and kept saying how much of a good guy matt was and stuff and on and on about him when all i wanted her to talk to me about was my damn cat.

whatever. she better be there when i get back or i will just about lose it.
I'm really not a crazy cat person like I seem, it's just that I have raised her since she was a kitten so it just kind of sucks that this happened.
I care too much about other things and other people that it ends up leaving me a complete mess. I can never just focus on myself really.

But I did treat myself to a couple good things on this trip. I got a new black leather purse from urban outfitters, and a couple sexy cute dresses from there, and I got some lingerie from this little botique and some new heels and some other outfits around the mall. Retail therapy can tend to make me feel better, not always but most of the time. I don't go shopping that often, since now I have had to be the one to pay for everything like my clothes and food since I have a job. But I saved money especially this trip to finally take some time and shop for summer clothes.
On the way back home tomorrow I really want to stop by Roanoke, where I was born. I was told that we could, but who knows if they will want to. I really hope so. That is the cutest little town, and monsterous hills. The average person who lives there has a drive way as steep as a.....really steep waterslide. ha.

okay I'm running out of good similes for things so now that means I need to go to bed. or keep talking to my friends on Facebook IM who I've been ignoring for this blog. It's nice to get everything out. I do like blogging, I do.
I have so many things to do when I get home though, everyones been trying to plan things with me the second I get there between beaufort and bluffton and hilton head and it's hard to combine them all as soon as I get home. It just wont happen. But what will happen is me seeing sex and the city 2, I HAVE to see it, I am a sex and the city fanatic.
This was fun.

xoxo,
yours

She found a love and he found a victim

Here are some of the pictures from DC/Wax museum that my cousin took. I have way more but these are really interesting:













Monday, May 24, 2010

My apologies-

To the ridiculous blog that I posted last night.
Anyways, I am on my uncles laptop right now and can't be on long.
But so far this trip has been amazing! I've gone shopping already in this gorgeous mall, and bought really...'hot' things ;)
tehe. and... I went on a 10 mile hike today! It was beautiful and very hilly. (I love love love hills! anywhere with hills, is a happy place for me.)
While we were hiking over this old decayed train track, to a distance you could see a field resembling the sound of music. With TAGGED cows! It was so sad to know that they were running around all happy and cute and eventually they were going to have their heads chopped off. or something. Ugh! Humans can be the worst.

I feel renewed and refreshed after todays hike, and saw bunches of cousins I havent seen in a while and kept getting told how much i'm turning into a "blossoming" young woman. Bull-shit.
Ha, just because I grew tits since the last time they saw me doesn't mean i'm this whole new person. I think I look the same for the most part, unfortunately.
Wednesday we get to go to DC, we are going to go to the wax museum first as I've explained and then I'm going to try to get everyone to go to the Holocaust because I reallllly want to go there.

I love this movie! I havent seen it in a while until earlier today, it's called 'Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice" It was made in 1969 and it's about a group of two friends slowly getting involved in a foursome. They explore this out of therapy sessions. You'll have to watch it, by director Paul Mazursky. I don't know if you have or haven't heard of him but he's pretty good.




My sleep schedule has been a lot better, I've gone to bed before or around midnight the past couple nights. I hope I fall in the same pattern this week. Weirdly enough, I still wake up around 11, tired and groggy.

annnnd, you're a cute little texting thing.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

I'm

completely and totally content.
with everything.
it's the best feeling,
and i'm having the BEST time.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Bahaha.

If Karla Compton and Davis Ruplinger had a baby:

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Exhaustion. I've been getting absolutely no sleep at night, and we all know what that causes.
Bright red eyes the whole next day.
I'm going to try to go to bed pretty early tonight, because I was walking around like a zombie all day today.
And randomly falling asleep places. Matt came over today around 12 because he said he wanted to tan or something, but I fell asleep on him the whole time, passed out on one of the chairs by the pool. Then he left, and I went to go visit my friends elsewhere and pay a little visit to Moes because I haven't been there in forever. I almost fell asleep walking to the door! We ran into Frampie and Tyler G, and some other people I didn't know and that was awkward just because I felt completely out of it and gross but I didn't really care. Then Abby told me she didn't feel like eating there, and I agreed. Big time.
Then this OTHER Matt I know (Viskovich) called me and he wanted to hang out a little bit before he had to go to work so he was around Sea Turtle cashing a check somewhere and we decided to get milkshakes at Cheeburger.
Abby of course was going buckwild with his camera phone taking picture after picture and I was burying my face in my arms like, the WHOLE time. and finally matt grabbed his phone back, but asked for a picture of me anyways so I just slid on my glasses and said, fuck it, one.
Other than that, the milkshakes were really good. But theres times where I can't stand pictures being taken, and when I love them being taken. Today, was a no-no.
Then I went to Abby's and fell asleep on her while watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and then decided to just go home. So here I am. I'm about to go to bed, I'm just waiting for my 30 minutes to be up because I'm using Crest White Strips. Which are bothering me right now, they taste icky. Ugh!
I can't wait to get a good nights sleep. And wake up and feel wahndaful.
Tomorrow I'm going to Savannah, so I DO need my beauty rest!

-xoxo

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

: (

Today was wonderful and fun,
and tonight is terrible!
I've got a bag of frozen peas on my head laying in just a baggy old t-shirt,
and i've been throwing up all night.

I hate feeling sick!

That is all.
Does anyone know of something going around...?

Monday, May 17, 2010

A gloomy day- Indeed!

Ugh! It just puts a damper on my day when I wake up to thunder and rain.
Actually, to be honest, I love waking up to rain and thunder, but NOT when I wanted to spend the day outside in the gorgeous sun!
I was planning on going to the beach today too, but now because of the weather that plan is shot.
I have errands to run anyhow, and I must get on them after this blog is through.
A determined person I know says that even though the weather is terrible, he still plans on spending his day outside at the pool playing Tornado! That's how I need to be.
I can't let rain ruin....everything. Then again, my friends wouldn't be willing to do anything outside either. But, that doesn't mean it's not a good gym day!

I am so incredibly excited for this weekend. I leave for Fairfax Virginia. This is where all my family lives, and it's located around my birthplace (Roanoke, Virginia). Roanoke is a beautiful town, known for the star that sits up on a gigantic hill! It's been there for years and years and years and years and years...



Sadly, we will not be visiting Roanoke. But I am just as content with visiting Fairfax! I love my uncles house, I know it's weird but since everyone there smokes I have grown to love the smokey scent that is carried throughout each and every inch of the house. They've got the most AMAZING basement too! It's theme is the "'50's". There is a bar down there and a ping pong table AND soda and snack machines that were used in the 1950's or 60's! There is also an Adams Family pinball machine. I have gotten so good at getting high scores on that. I can also practice playing pool. Fairfax is also only 45 minutes outside DC. We will also be visiting DC, I'm going to do CRAZY shopping, and visit the wax museum! I cannot wait. I'd also like to visit the Holocaust or the Smithsonian museums. As you all know, the Holocaust is a museum concentrating on the concentration camps, and World War II. Jewish artifacts! Hooray! And, I've always been so interested in reading and watching movies about the concentration camps and how awfully the Jews were treated. (Check out The Pianist or The boy in the Striped Pajamas)
And the Smithsonian is just one of the most remarkable museums around! I've been once to both museums, but was too young to remember any of it. However, never have I ever been to a WAX museum!
This will most definitely be a fun week, AND not to mention we will be seeing Cheap Trick live. haha! How random...

Enough fantasizing about this fun week ahead of me, I am doing anything I can to keep my mind off of the things that are getting me down. I don't feel as if it's appropriate to write down what those things might be because they are fairly new and who knows what kind of mean things I'd say and regret later. All I know is I'm making a new change for myself, and for that I am proud. I talked to Ian who I've been friends with longer than most people I know in Hilton Head last night as well, and he can be more than comforting.
Who knows, maybe now I am going to find what I'm looking for and generally be the happiest girl.

And with that- the rain stops.
It's amazing.
With that que, I will put on my shoes, and continue on with my day.
I've also got Minus the Bear STUUUUCK in my head, so I have to listen to them as soon as I get in the car.

Cheers! : )

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Lack of colour

I have something to share with everyone. Yesterday I visited Beaufort and saw my adorable (redheaded) neice, Nevaeh! She just got a brand new bike so I filmed her using it for a few seconds.... then she starts to film ME looking like an idiot riding it, I have never felt more ...old. I can't fit on the damn thing. Oh well. It was a fun day, also spent with my lovely friends!





Then I come home today, to realize...
everyones an ASSHOLE!
and by everyone- I do in fact mean you. But you know this.
ugh. I hate twitter, and facebook. Just works me up.

Friday, May 14, 2010

"From my boat, I can see your house. And when the lights are on, I can watch you move"

Hi! I just wanted to let you guys know about a great band that I have been very into for years, Mew.
Mew has a very unique sound and I can never get sick of them, and they really have this creative side that I haven't even noticed much before!
In every song, there is some hidden message. They are almost impossible to figure out though.
My favorite Mew song has always been 156, but now it's Eight flew over, One was destroyed.
But, I will show you the music video that was made by Mew and finally I think I am starting to understand the little cartoon they put together. People are always trying to create some meaning behind this confusing music video, but I like to take bits and pieces and put a story together myself.



My blogspot might cut it off a bit, but if you are determined enough to view this than you will find a way I'm sure.
I'm not going to go into my description of what I think it's about, but I'd like to hear yours!
Mew is one of the top bands that I would love to see live- however, unfortunately they are from Europe. Meaning, they don't come here! Maybe they will, and I'll be a lucky lucky girl. Or maybe one day I'll be in Europe.... : )

hmmm. I doubt I'd be in Europe to see them perform, if I can barely make a plan for myself to go see a show only 4 or 5 hours away! Ugh. I am so useless sometimes, I swear.
But- I always have good intentions.

Anyways, please take some time and get to know Mew because they have many enticing songs and lyrics, oh not to mention the beautiful instruments they use! I just love foreign bands.
My favorite album they have is Frengers, and here are some recommended songs from that album. (actually, I'll probably list mostly ALL the songs on the album, but I'm putting them in the order that I like the best at least :] )
- Eight Flew Over, One was Destroyed
- Symmetry
- 156
- She Came home for Christmas
- SheSpider
- Snow Brigade
- Am I Wry? No
- Comforting sounds
- Her Voice is beyond her Years
- Behind the Drapes

Songs I like from other albums are:
- The zookeepers boy (From: And the Glass Handed Kites)
- Cartoons and Macrame Wounds (From: No More Stories..)
- Intermezzo 1 AND 2 (From: No More Stories..)

and I could go on, but... I'm sure you can find your own favorites, I gave you enough of mine!
In the mood for MORE foreign artists? Check out Sigur Ros, Bjork, FOTOS, Anathallo, Gobbledigook, ect.
I hope you all enjoy what you hear, and if you don't, then no worries.
And I hope you guys all have an amazing summer! So far, I've had some fun, but also it's been pretty stressful! Definitely not getting into that. Here is what I've been up to :











In a couple pictures you are probably wondering, what is up with the strawberries? Well, My friend Kristen and I decided to take a day to pick strawberries! We went to Dempsey Farms located in Beaufort, SC (Helena Island) for only 3.45 a bucket! And I'm talking about 20-30 extremely fresh picked strawberries juicy and sweet, and ready to eat. Thats a better deal than any supermarket can give you, I suggest that you start picking your OWN fruits and vegetables, it's a great hobby to get into for the summer. (and cheap!)

now, I am so tired and I am going to call it a night.

goodnight!

Sunday, May 9, 2010