HFOIGDSHGIODFHG!
frustration....station?
i love nice people.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Sunday, February 21, 2010
boy you're just a stupid bitch, and girl you're just a no-good dick.
i felt, it's time for a blog.
even though i've got nothing too important to say, and less people read my blogs lately (well, except for a few friends, and some family) and... eh. it's overdue, i guess.
for starters, it was one of the fastest weekends ever. I mean, my god. Friday seemed like this morning.
and it's now Sunday. Well, technically 'monday' but, we're just going to say sunday.
Friday was definitely one of the most cutest days in a long time. Now and then, I wish I could replay it. Other times, it seems too surreal. Whatever it was, it was a happy-making day, so worry not.
My skin is bugging me. I hate the freckles on my arms, and the cold weather just doesn't make it feel good to touch, or look at. I feel that way at least. I'm always mostly happy with my skin in the summer, not because there's somewhat of a natural bronze tone, but it feels healthier.
Fortunately, it's slowly getting warmer. It was so beautiful today!
I spent most of it outside. I even played basketball..
That's because Bridget, Abby, and I were outside at Hampton Lakes trying to find things to do. It was really warm, but not quite warm enough for the pool. So, we laid out in our little sundresses by the pool and talked for a while. Then I turned my head and saw a cute little playground. Exploring is what we did. We played and played, and it was heaps of fun.
then next to the play ground was a tiny secluded basketball court, with a bin of basketballs and all these grills scattered around the court for grillouts and like 10 picnic tables. In our dresses, we played basketball. It looked ridiculous. I made lots of baskets, even one from half-court! (I don't know the basketball term for that.)
We played Horse and Around the World. Ha. and then laid on the court, in close perimeters, with the sun beating down on our legs.
Wow, did I really just type out my whole day at Hampton Lakes? Who the hell would even want to read that? Oh man.
my mind feels like an absolute minefield. i don't even know where to start. even if i did, it's too personal to blog about. i don't like it though, it's too much to even think. there is too much going around in there, it's driving me crazy.
ay yi yi.
on that note- sleep i go.
it feels like someone left a fiery torch down my throat that i can't retrieve.
even though i've got nothing too important to say, and less people read my blogs lately (well, except for a few friends, and some family) and... eh. it's overdue, i guess.
for starters, it was one of the fastest weekends ever. I mean, my god. Friday seemed like this morning.
and it's now Sunday. Well, technically 'monday' but, we're just going to say sunday.
Friday was definitely one of the most cutest days in a long time. Now and then, I wish I could replay it. Other times, it seems too surreal. Whatever it was, it was a happy-making day, so worry not.
My skin is bugging me. I hate the freckles on my arms, and the cold weather just doesn't make it feel good to touch, or look at. I feel that way at least. I'm always mostly happy with my skin in the summer, not because there's somewhat of a natural bronze tone, but it feels healthier.
Fortunately, it's slowly getting warmer. It was so beautiful today!
I spent most of it outside. I even played basketball..
That's because Bridget, Abby, and I were outside at Hampton Lakes trying to find things to do. It was really warm, but not quite warm enough for the pool. So, we laid out in our little sundresses by the pool and talked for a while. Then I turned my head and saw a cute little playground. Exploring is what we did. We played and played, and it was heaps of fun.
then next to the play ground was a tiny secluded basketball court, with a bin of basketballs and all these grills scattered around the court for grillouts and like 10 picnic tables. In our dresses, we played basketball. It looked ridiculous. I made lots of baskets, even one from half-court! (I don't know the basketball term for that.)
We played Horse and Around the World. Ha. and then laid on the court, in close perimeters, with the sun beating down on our legs.
Wow, did I really just type out my whole day at Hampton Lakes? Who the hell would even want to read that? Oh man.
my mind feels like an absolute minefield. i don't even know where to start. even if i did, it's too personal to blog about. i don't like it though, it's too much to even think. there is too much going around in there, it's driving me crazy.
ay yi yi.
on that note- sleep i go.
it feels like someone left a fiery torch down my throat that i can't retrieve.
Monday, February 15, 2010
blood bank
i am so late with good bands.
it's always bands or artists that i know i would like if i got into them, just because other people like the same band but i'll be to stubborn to listen to it if it's because someone else told me to.
and then months later, i end up listening to it for myself and then i really enjoy it, and then i'm just...really late.
ha.
that made no sense, oh well.
right now i'm listening to lots of 'The Tallest Man on Earth' my favorite track being 'where do my bluebirds fly'
this is going to be a busy week.
it's a good thing though. getting things done, can be really good karma.
i still really want to go see circa survive. and i am, i found someone to accompany me. it's kind of far, but i really really want to go. davis is going as well.
so today in a parking lot, i saw a man bowling. his stance was kind of...eh. he had no ball or pins. but hey, at least he was having fun.
nothing is the same anymore, almost everything i can pinpoint is something different then it was even a year ago.
that including myself. i realized that i always complain about changes in my blogs, but i noticed i never said anything about myself changing. if it's for the good, or if it's for the bad, i can't tell.
i'm not satisfied though, with whatever it is. maybe it's who i hang out with, maybe it's things i do.
but i don't feel like my interests have changed at all. even if i go to parties, i never really have fun. and even if i'm in the car with my friends and they play music, i don't always like it, sometimes not at all. my music taste is really only the consistent thing in my life right now. although i go through 'instrumental', 'acoustic', or 'oldie' phases, it's still always the same.
nothing else i can honestly say is consistent.
even my college plans have changed a lot. the beginning of the school year, i wanted to go to SCAD for fashion. until i realized, i won't have much of a future in that. i think it hit me that i'm not good at constructing outfits when Erin and I were making dresses for davis's little hipster party made of duct tape. i thought mine looked neat, but then i looked at erins and got jealous.
hers was way better than mine was.
then again, she's one of those people that tends to be better at just about everything than i am.
but my dress, well, it actually sucked, and failed to fit over my ass.
so, after realizing my lack in fashion talent (just because i like to wear cute clothes, doesn't mean it's my career path) i noticed how interested in psychology i was. when i was little, i used to tell my parents how i wanted to be a psychologist one day. and i really did. in fact, i never wanted to stop being one. so i developed this plan to go to CofC to major in that. Mainly, because my favorite atmosphere is a city and that would be the best choice for an instate college being in a city which i largely admire. and, who knows, if i go there i can always transfer to somewhere else in another state. but that's not to be thought about now.
that is my plan as of now. but once again, since nothing is consistent, who knows. the one thing i do know, is i won't end up at a football obsessed school and go to tailgating parties and be around a bunch of tool-guys.
no. not my type. you can really tell a lot about a guy, just about what city or town they live in.
i cant wait to meet a whole sea of them.
the guys here just seem boring, and they seem dumb.
oh. and perverted. i don't know why guys think that is a turn on to girls.
well, this might be my last blog for a while. i have too much to do this week to bloooooooooooooog.
cheerio.
by the way-
this is beautiful.
it's always bands or artists that i know i would like if i got into them, just because other people like the same band but i'll be to stubborn to listen to it if it's because someone else told me to.
and then months later, i end up listening to it for myself and then i really enjoy it, and then i'm just...really late.
ha.
that made no sense, oh well.
right now i'm listening to lots of 'The Tallest Man on Earth' my favorite track being 'where do my bluebirds fly'
this is going to be a busy week.
it's a good thing though. getting things done, can be really good karma.
i still really want to go see circa survive. and i am, i found someone to accompany me. it's kind of far, but i really really want to go. davis is going as well.
so today in a parking lot, i saw a man bowling. his stance was kind of...eh. he had no ball or pins. but hey, at least he was having fun.
nothing is the same anymore, almost everything i can pinpoint is something different then it was even a year ago.
that including myself. i realized that i always complain about changes in my blogs, but i noticed i never said anything about myself changing. if it's for the good, or if it's for the bad, i can't tell.
i'm not satisfied though, with whatever it is. maybe it's who i hang out with, maybe it's things i do.
but i don't feel like my interests have changed at all. even if i go to parties, i never really have fun. and even if i'm in the car with my friends and they play music, i don't always like it, sometimes not at all. my music taste is really only the consistent thing in my life right now. although i go through 'instrumental', 'acoustic', or 'oldie' phases, it's still always the same.
nothing else i can honestly say is consistent.
even my college plans have changed a lot. the beginning of the school year, i wanted to go to SCAD for fashion. until i realized, i won't have much of a future in that. i think it hit me that i'm not good at constructing outfits when Erin and I were making dresses for davis's little hipster party made of duct tape. i thought mine looked neat, but then i looked at erins and got jealous.
hers was way better than mine was.
then again, she's one of those people that tends to be better at just about everything than i am.
but my dress, well, it actually sucked, and failed to fit over my ass.
so, after realizing my lack in fashion talent (just because i like to wear cute clothes, doesn't mean it's my career path) i noticed how interested in psychology i was. when i was little, i used to tell my parents how i wanted to be a psychologist one day. and i really did. in fact, i never wanted to stop being one. so i developed this plan to go to CofC to major in that. Mainly, because my favorite atmosphere is a city and that would be the best choice for an instate college being in a city which i largely admire. and, who knows, if i go there i can always transfer to somewhere else in another state. but that's not to be thought about now.
that is my plan as of now. but once again, since nothing is consistent, who knows. the one thing i do know, is i won't end up at a football obsessed school and go to tailgating parties and be around a bunch of tool-guys.
no. not my type. you can really tell a lot about a guy, just about what city or town they live in.
i cant wait to meet a whole sea of them.
the guys here just seem boring, and they seem dumb.
oh. and perverted. i don't know why guys think that is a turn on to girls.
well, this might be my last blog for a while. i have too much to do this week to bloooooooooooooog.
cheerio.
by the way-
this is beautiful.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
'My tongue will taste of gin and malicious intent
bring you back to the bar, get you out of the cold
a sober straight face gets you out of your clothes.
& they're scared, that we know all the crimes they'll commit
who they'll kiss before they get home.
I will lie awake & lie for fun and fake the way I hold you,
let you fall for every empty word I say.'
bring you back to the bar, get you out of the cold
a sober straight face gets you out of your clothes.
& they're scared, that we know all the crimes they'll commit
who they'll kiss before they get home.
I will lie awake & lie for fun and fake the way I hold you,
let you fall for every empty word I say.'
Monday, February 8, 2010
so go and riddle me over.
joy.
today was the longest of days.
i've been bitter, i've been tired, and all these terrible feelings.
and it wasn't until 3 or 4ish that I knew why.
this sucks.
because,
i even turned down movie night with bridget. i feel like a complete monster right now!
but, later davis and i went to la hacienda.
i realized that guy everyone talks about 'yates' was sitting two booths behind us.
davis knew who he was right away just because of his distinct voice. God! I had to hear this kid blabber about politics for an hour using really cheesy words with great annoyance.
and then i was trying to look over to see what he looked like, almost peeking behind my booth, and stumbled out like the idiot i am.
ha, it was quite humorous.
although this day has basically been, awful, my night was pretty good.
i got to video chat too, i have always loved that
at work, i saw a man who strangely resembled steve martin (i guess it's not hard to do if you have the right hair and nose), and i made a note to never tell someone they looked like steve martin again.
it's frustrating when people have tried to get with you in the past, then say awful things about you afterwards, and then get persistent about getting with you again.
it's not going to happen.
sorry.
i may be available but i am also very, very selective. too selective, i may add.
this may or may not be a problem. i'm not sure anymore.
it makes me a little sad when i see people slowly start to change. i favor people the most when they are different from everyone else and feel no need to conform to the lifestyles around them.
this is to no one in particular- it's honestly about a couple people i can name on the top of my head right now.
my most listened to song right now is riddle in londontown by state radio.
it's from their older album us against the crown, but i forgot how absolutely beautiful it is. i wish i could remember if they played it when i saw them live or not.
can't remember for the life of me.
i really really hope this is a good month. and march. and april.
i said in my last blog that it was going to be, but i honestly never really know.
i make all these plans, but will i do them?
i want to. i have to.
seeing as my dad will be out of the....country the majority of the month, it's a good possibility.
bah. it's 12:57. meaning it's a whole new day and i can leave yesterday behind me.
when i wake up, i can only hope the day is nothing but beautiful.
today was the longest of days.
i've been bitter, i've been tired, and all these terrible feelings.
and it wasn't until 3 or 4ish that I knew why.
this sucks.
because,
i even turned down movie night with bridget. i feel like a complete monster right now!
but, later davis and i went to la hacienda.
i realized that guy everyone talks about 'yates' was sitting two booths behind us.
davis knew who he was right away just because of his distinct voice. God! I had to hear this kid blabber about politics for an hour using really cheesy words with great annoyance.
and then i was trying to look over to see what he looked like, almost peeking behind my booth, and stumbled out like the idiot i am.
ha, it was quite humorous.
although this day has basically been, awful, my night was pretty good.
i got to video chat too, i have always loved that
at work, i saw a man who strangely resembled steve martin (i guess it's not hard to do if you have the right hair and nose), and i made a note to never tell someone they looked like steve martin again.
it's frustrating when people have tried to get with you in the past, then say awful things about you afterwards, and then get persistent about getting with you again.
it's not going to happen.
sorry.
i may be available but i am also very, very selective. too selective, i may add.
this may or may not be a problem. i'm not sure anymore.
it makes me a little sad when i see people slowly start to change. i favor people the most when they are different from everyone else and feel no need to conform to the lifestyles around them.
this is to no one in particular- it's honestly about a couple people i can name on the top of my head right now.
my most listened to song right now is riddle in londontown by state radio.
it's from their older album us against the crown, but i forgot how absolutely beautiful it is. i wish i could remember if they played it when i saw them live or not.
can't remember for the life of me.
i really really hope this is a good month. and march. and april.
i said in my last blog that it was going to be, but i honestly never really know.
i make all these plans, but will i do them?
i want to. i have to.
seeing as my dad will be out of the....country the majority of the month, it's a good possibility.
bah. it's 12:57. meaning it's a whole new day and i can leave yesterday behind me.
when i wake up, i can only hope the day is nothing but beautiful.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
ouuuuuuuuuuuch!
pants just totally attacked the shit out of me, ha.
i thought we were just playing around and then she just went nuts.
:(
I love pants and all, but, my arm really hurts right now so I'm really close to just selling her or something, ha.
i've never been a huge 'superbowl' fan, so bridget & i attended some stupid little superbowl get together, and basically ate their chips & dip and left.
i turned on the puppy bowl on her tv and we concluded that was way better.
seemed as if everyone else smoked a 'super' bowl for the 'superbowl'!
I love how I'm putting quotient marks over superbowl.
meh, it's not such a great night and all i want is to watch sex & the city except that can't happen.
but.
Dinner with Davis tomorrow, yipee!
Cheers to an exciting next few months, aye?
pants just totally attacked the shit out of me, ha.
i thought we were just playing around and then she just went nuts.
:(
I love pants and all, but, my arm really hurts right now so I'm really close to just selling her or something, ha.
i've never been a huge 'superbowl' fan, so bridget & i attended some stupid little superbowl get together, and basically ate their chips & dip and left.
i turned on the puppy bowl on her tv and we concluded that was way better.
seemed as if everyone else smoked a 'super' bowl for the 'superbowl'!
I love how I'm putting quotient marks over superbowl.
meh, it's not such a great night and all i want is to watch sex & the city except that can't happen.
but.
Dinner with Davis tomorrow, yipee!
Cheers to an exciting next few months, aye?
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Thursday, February 4, 2010
put on a pretty face, you'll always win.
here I am, it's 3 a.m. yet again.
of course, I'm able to sleep. I know I'm tired enough.
let's just say, if my body ran half as much as my mind did, i'd be in great shape.
I spend too much time worrying about things I can't control.
I should cut that out.
Minus the bears Into The Mirror is pretty good.
I love how late I am to everything.
but I don't see it as a race.
twitter is dumb. depending on who you have on your list, I guess.
people that say awful things and get way out of line for nothing at all,
they are either just completely over-dramatic or...
a little insecure. or both. either way, i'm not one to pick at them. I just need to really watch what I say on twitter.
I watched 'Guess who's coming to dinner' today, with Katharine Hepburn ha. So cute, I love old movies.
well, i wasn't even planning on writing a blog tonight. didn't want to. I just figured it would be a quick cure for my slight insomnia.
I sure hope it was.
I need to wake up early to shower and catch a movie with some friends at noon!
-always
of course, I'm able to sleep. I know I'm tired enough.
let's just say, if my body ran half as much as my mind did, i'd be in great shape.
I spend too much time worrying about things I can't control.
I should cut that out.
Minus the bears Into The Mirror is pretty good.
I love how late I am to everything.
but I don't see it as a race.
twitter is dumb. depending on who you have on your list, I guess.
people that say awful things and get way out of line for nothing at all,
they are either just completely over-dramatic or...
a little insecure. or both. either way, i'm not one to pick at them. I just need to really watch what I say on twitter.
I watched 'Guess who's coming to dinner' today, with Katharine Hepburn ha. So cute, I love old movies.
well, i wasn't even planning on writing a blog tonight. didn't want to. I just figured it would be a quick cure for my slight insomnia.
I sure hope it was.
I need to wake up early to shower and catch a movie with some friends at noon!
-always
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Monday, February 1, 2010
"suck on my fingertips until you kill all my prints, so my boyfriend has no clue of how much i've been touching you."
March 16th will be amazing, end of the brace-face era!
I'm so used to how I look now, I don't know how I'll get used to this.
But it will be new, and I can't be more excited.
Today was another Beaufort day, seeing as it was an appointment day.
I saw a couple friends & then an old acquaintance of mine, Lucas, took me to lunch.
Apparently he saw me driving or something & sent me a text. I didn't even have his number anymore so it was weird, I had no idea who it was at first.
But overall, it was alright. We talked about what has been going on in our lives, and sadly I saw how he's done nothing at all with his life except rot in a small shared smoked out apartment with his old high school drop out friends, playing Marble Blast Ultra on Xbox live daily, as well as the other x box games the boy species play. It's just so weird.
and the first thing he could say to me after all this time was, "wow. you've grown."
Other than all of that, it was enjoyable.
I am getting rather frustrated with my laptop these days. It keeps overheating, and I don't even do that much on it.
I just started playing tetris and after five minutes, it keeps freezing and making that loud sound computers make when it sounds like they are breathing really heavily, and they are so warm.
I wonder if Macs do this....
probably not. But I will not conform!
I'm trying to stay old school as long as possible, even though any sorts of laptops arent old school, technology is moving too rapidly. What will be after the Mac, Itouch, I....pad? What is next? IRobot? ...wait, that's a movie.
but seriously. When my sisters were my age, they talked to their friends more on the phone then on these stupid new things now. I won't even go into this, I'll rant forever. Nobody wants that haha.
um, i'm tired. adios!
I'm so used to how I look now, I don't know how I'll get used to this.
But it will be new, and I can't be more excited.
Today was another Beaufort day, seeing as it was an appointment day.
I saw a couple friends & then an old acquaintance of mine, Lucas, took me to lunch.
Apparently he saw me driving or something & sent me a text. I didn't even have his number anymore so it was weird, I had no idea who it was at first.
But overall, it was alright. We talked about what has been going on in our lives, and sadly I saw how he's done nothing at all with his life except rot in a small shared smoked out apartment with his old high school drop out friends, playing Marble Blast Ultra on Xbox live daily, as well as the other x box games the boy species play. It's just so weird.
and the first thing he could say to me after all this time was, "wow. you've grown."
Other than all of that, it was enjoyable.
I am getting rather frustrated with my laptop these days. It keeps overheating, and I don't even do that much on it.
I just started playing tetris and after five minutes, it keeps freezing and making that loud sound computers make when it sounds like they are breathing really heavily, and they are so warm.
I wonder if Macs do this....
probably not. But I will not conform!
I'm trying to stay old school as long as possible, even though any sorts of laptops arent old school, technology is moving too rapidly. What will be after the Mac, Itouch, I....pad? What is next? IRobot? ...wait, that's a movie.
but seriously. When my sisters were my age, they talked to their friends more on the phone then on these stupid new things now. I won't even go into this, I'll rant forever. Nobody wants that haha.
um, i'm tired. adios!
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