I bid you adieu.

hm, what happened to blogging. it was a 2 month fad.
well, for a majority of people, that is. i've been using this stupid thing for about two years.
a lot of blogs unread of course, and I have no problem with it.

recently the fads are (still) twitter, and now the contagious formspring, spreading like small pox. even though that's non-existent now. i think.
anyways, i have a formspring. i made it about three months ago but only knew two other people that had it and didn't want to post it around because i was a little uneasy about the concept of the website. now, i figured i'd really try it out. it just causes frustration, people get a high from posting pointless questions with a masked identity.
i've asked a couple dumb questions myself, but only to close friends that i always tell them about later. or a couple to that girl jean, which now i feel bad about. meh.

i haven't really been up to too much lately. i've been working my butt off with school work and running errands and going to work.
plus for the last few weeks, i've been at the gym almost daily. not to get built like those determined women...

ew. no. ha, but you know, just to stay healthy and fit. also, my diet has improved as well. but i'm not quite lame enough to get into detail about it.

well, i really thought i had a lot to blog about but i'm not thinking of words too proficiently.
the internet has taken too much out of me, i'm sick of it.
and talking to people on it.
it's confusing because i misjudge peoples emotions too easily, and it either makes me really happy, upset, or pissed.
if you talk to someone online, anyone, daily- conversations are not always going to be what you want them to be. emotions and emphasizing words or phrases are too difficult to be correctly conveyed.
which is why i'm so fucking sick of 'cyber-world' like facebook, msn, aim, even twitter sometimes.
it just gets to be annoying.
so. everyone. i'm proudly announcing that I am going to refrain from the internet (other than my studies) for the next few days. or, i'll try to at least ha.
so don't think about contacting me by putting slight pressure on the keys of your keyboard.
there's not much effort or thought involved.
you can come see me, or by using cell phones.
it don't maaaaatter.

well, to you twatting, facebooking, social-networking punks, ciao!

I will end this blog with this video. ha, first aaron posted it on my facebook saying it was me in 5 years (which i would hope i'd be less greasy looking, but i would totally perform a seductive yet classy number if i could.) and from there, i've grown to find it quite catchy.

ah, neat.





i want you most at your best.

HFOIGDSHGIODFHG!
frustration....station?


i love nice people.

boy you're just a stupid bitch, and girl you're just a no-good dick.

i felt, it's time for a blog.
even though i've got nothing too important to say, and less people read my blogs lately (well, except for a few friends, and some family) and... eh. it's overdue, i guess.
for starters, it was one of the fastest weekends ever. I mean, my god. Friday seemed like this morning.
and it's now Sunday. Well, technically 'monday' but, we're just going to say sunday.
Friday was definitely one of the most cutest days in a long time. Now and then, I wish I could replay it. Other times, it seems too surreal. Whatever it was, it was a happy-making day, so worry not.
My skin is bugging me. I hate the freckles on my arms, and the cold weather just doesn't make it feel good to touch, or look at. I feel that way at least. I'm always mostly happy with my skin in the summer, not because there's somewhat of a natural bronze tone, but it feels healthier.
Fortunately, it's slowly getting warmer. It was so beautiful today!
I spent most of it outside. I even played basketball..
That's because Bridget, Abby, and I were outside at Hampton Lakes trying to find things to do. It was really warm, but not quite warm enough for the pool. So, we laid out in our little sundresses by the pool and talked for a while. Then I turned my head and saw a cute little playground. Exploring is what we did. We played and played, and it was heaps of fun.
then next to the play ground was a tiny secluded basketball court, with a bin of basketballs and all these grills scattered around the court for grillouts and like 10 picnic tables. In our dresses, we played basketball. It looked ridiculous. I made lots of baskets, even one from half-court! (I don't know the basketball term for that.)
We played Horse and Around the World. Ha. and then laid on the court, in close perimeters, with the sun beating down on our legs.

Wow, did I really just type out my whole day at Hampton Lakes? Who the hell would even want to read that? Oh man.

my mind feels like an absolute minefield. i don't even know where to start. even if i did, it's too personal to blog about. i don't like it though, it's too much to even think. there is too much going around in there, it's driving me crazy.

ay yi yi.
on that note- sleep i go.
it feels like someone left a fiery torch down my throat that i can't retrieve.

blood bank

i am so late with good bands.
it's always bands or artists that i know i would like if i got into them, just because other people like the same band but i'll be to stubborn to listen to it if it's because someone else told me to.
and then months later, i end up listening to it for myself and then i really enjoy it, and then i'm just...really late.
ha.
that made no sense, oh well.
right now i'm listening to lots of 'The Tallest Man on Earth' my favorite track being 'where do my bluebirds fly'


this is going to be a busy week.
it's a good thing though. getting things done, can be really good karma.

i still really want to go see circa survive. and i am, i found someone to accompany me. it's kind of far, but i really really want to go. davis is going as well.

so today in a parking lot, i saw a man bowling. his stance was kind of...eh. he had no ball or pins. but hey, at least he was having fun.

nothing is the same anymore, almost everything i can pinpoint is something different then it was even a year ago.
that including myself. i realized that i always complain about changes in my blogs, but i noticed i never said anything about myself changing. if it's for the good, or if it's for the bad, i can't tell.
i'm not satisfied though, with whatever it is. maybe it's who i hang out with, maybe it's things i do.
but i don't feel like my interests have changed at all. even if i go to parties, i never really have fun. and even if i'm in the car with my friends and they play music, i don't always like it, sometimes not at all. my music taste is really only the consistent thing in my life right now. although i go through 'instrumental', 'acoustic', or 'oldie' phases, it's still always the same.
nothing else i can honestly say is consistent.
even my college plans have changed a lot. the beginning of the school year, i wanted to go to SCAD for fashion. until i realized, i won't have much of a future in that. i think it hit me that i'm not good at constructing outfits when Erin and I were making dresses for davis's little hipster party made of duct tape. i thought mine looked neat, but then i looked at erins and got jealous.
hers was way better than mine was.
then again, she's one of those people that tends to be better at just about everything than i am.
but my dress, well, it actually sucked, and failed to fit over my ass.

so, after realizing my lack in fashion talent (just because i like to wear cute clothes, doesn't mean it's my career path) i noticed how interested in psychology i was. when i was little, i used to tell my parents how i wanted to be a psychologist one day. and i really did. in fact, i never wanted to stop being one. so i developed this plan to go to CofC to major in that. Mainly, because my favorite atmosphere is a city and that would be the best choice for an instate college being in a city which i largely admire. and, who knows, if i go there i can always transfer to somewhere else in another state. but that's not to be thought about now.

that is my plan as of now. but once again, since nothing is consistent, who knows. the one thing i do know, is i won't end up at a football obsessed school and go to tailgating parties and be around a bunch of tool-guys.
no. not my type. you can really tell a lot about a guy, just about what city or town they live in.
i cant wait to meet a whole sea of them.
the guys here just seem boring, and they seem dumb.
oh. and perverted. i don't know why guys think that is a turn on to girls.

well, this might be my last blog for a while. i have too much to do this week to bloooooooooooooog.

cheerio.


by the way-
this is beautiful.

I don't think valentines day can get anymore fucking lame right now.

I feel like I look like Alice in Wonderland right now.


amazing.